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Is Online Gaming Destroying Family Values?

by Steven Williamson on 3 January 2006, 11:36

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Online gaming has spiralled. Some gamers admit to spending up to 20 hours in one stretch playing online. Is this just a harmless fun diversion from reality? Or a dangerous obsession that will ultimately cut out family communication?

People of all ages are spending hours upon hours online playing PC and console games, shut away from the rest of the family in their own reality world of RPGs, army games and first person shooters.

But, is online gaming ruining communication with the family? When was the last time you sat down for a meal with your family or discussed the meaning of life with your brother or sister?

When I was a child, around the age of 8, I barely watched T.V or played video games. We were more accustomed to going for bike rides, playing ‘family orientated’ games or visiting places of interest as part of a family unit. Of course all that changed in 1982 when the gaming world was revealed to me in the form of the ZX81. I spent many hours in solitude in my bedroom playing the likes of 3D monstor maze and Football Manager. Through the years my interest in gaming spiralled and more and more time was spent through my teenage years becoming accustom to the latest football or fighting game on the market. As the technical and graphical aspects of gaming improved so did my passion for playing games. The ‘nail in the coffin’ of my own family values came playing great PC titles such as Half Life and World Of Warcraft. I’m also first to admit that Xbox live did change the way I communicated with loved ones. I dread to think how many hours I have put into Halo 2 on Xbox live.In the past I have neglected my girlfriend by playing online throughout the evening, chatting idly away to those faceless friends and ignoring the pleas to take some ‘time out’. She couldn't talk to me whilst I was playing. There was no point.I couldn't hear anything anyway I was so emerged in games such as EverQuest on PC or Halo 2 on the Xbox.

I’ve now managed to obtain a healthy balance between online gaming and family life. This happened purely due to a ‘shock tactic’ used my girlfriend. “It’s either me or the Xbox”, she announced one evening. After thinking about this for some time, I think I actually left it overnight, I knew that she was far more important than those people I had met online and those fantastic games I had grown to love. Sometimes it takes life changing moments to wake you up from the gaming bubble and realise that, although gaming is a wonderful thing, it can take over your life and make you immune to what is going around you. This is my personal experience but I know many people who have had the same issues with girlfriends. Perhaps I was just weak willed and selfish in my obsession or perhaps gaming took such a grip on me I couldn’t shake it off. The line between a casual gamer and an addicted gamer is very slim indeed.

Gaming's fun though, right? Surely it's only prudes who tell you that you shouldn't spend vast amounts of time online? Gaming is just a fun pastime after all. Instead of going to the cinema, watching Eastenders or going for a walk we decide to play games. This is very true, until it starts to take up more time then you can afford to give up. Ever phoned in sick to work just because a new game is being launched? Or lied to family members who have invited you somewhere, just so you can stay in and play some more of your favourite online game? Ever spent more than 8 hours online in one session and gone to bed with game scenarios still whizzing around your head, dreaming about planning your next strategy when you wake up in the morning?

It can be argued that any decline in family life is mostly down to the 'modern' lifestyle that we live in. The dream of suburbia has turned into a soul-sucking commute to and from work. No time or energy to play, or cook proper meals. The culture of fear fostered by the media means we won't let our kids out of our sight anymore. Parents are happy for those children to be ‘safe’ sitting behind their PC or consoles.

With the emergence of bigger and better online games the situtaion is great for the casual gamer but devastating for those addicted gamers.If you can control your gaming there is no problem. If people start to suffer as a result of your online activities you really need to re-assess your situation. I'll always be a hardcore gamer, but I now work gaming around my family not the other way around. Family values are very important and crucial to your moral and spiritual well being. I sorted myself out, so can you!


HEXUS Forums :: 8 Comments

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I'm wondering when it became only online gaming that caused the breakdown in family communication, instead of gaming in general.
Gaming…. ruining family life :o


Shurrup will you. We used to settle all those family issues of who is going to do the dishes etc would be the looser of a quick deathmatch of which game we used to play at the moment, or if more than 2 we'd fire up super monkeyball to settle who was washing the dishes :D

Communication for family is ideal as well. I speak to more of my family on WoW ( yes…. my uncle and cousins are in my guild along with my brother ) than anywhere. Login, say hello… go kick some alliance ass and then log off :)
Unfortunately none of my family are gamers.

It would be great if they were. My brother has an Xbox at home, and broadband and a starter kit but he can't be arsed to set it up. Grrrrr. He's had it for about 6 months.

My mum has just about got the coordination and patience to play through one level of a Mario game.

My girlfriend is slowly coming around to gaming but she'll only play RPG's or adventure games.
What sort of RPG's does your gf like? I've had some great fun playing various coop RPG's… Infact, it's my online gaming genre of choice ;)
hoodmeister
What sort of RPG's does your gf like? I've had some great fun playing various coop RPG's… Infact, it's my online gaming genre of choice ;)

She'll be on the beta testing for Final Fantasy on Xbox 360.

Plus she loves Fable,KOTR and KOTR2, Jade Empire. She doesn't use the PC for games. I'm hoping Final Fantasy will introduce to online gaming.